We went snorkeling with amazing weather off the coast of a small island Tanankely-- "small earth." The water was unbelievably clear (average visibility 45ft...meaning sometimes more....!), sands were white, and the sea life was incredible. I'm ignorant concerning the sea and therefore know very little about what I saw. Nonetheless....amazing!
At first I thought to myself "Whoah...I need to remember that!" but then it became impossible to remember. So many beautiful tropical fish of such diverse colors and shapes. A HUGE sea cucumber, sea anemones, many different types of coral, sea urchines of large black spines, shrimp-like somethings. It was unbelievably gorgeous. The only thing stopping me was the eventual salt in my lungs from being very unpractised with the snorkel. To top it all off I saw sea turtles!! my sea turtle expert of a friend informs me that they were hawksbill turtles. I got to swim with sea turtles! and even touch one! in nature! oh la la. moreover, my friend andrew got a short video of me swimming up to and touching one of the turtles.
after a morning of exploration of the sea, we had a beautiful picnic lunch on the beach under some trees that look like hibiscus. at least the same family. although I know i've only seen a small portion of this country, i didn't expect a coral reef habitat so lovely. maybe i subconciously thought that all it's wonders had been revealed?
We are back in Tana now preparing for departure. Last minute gifts, last minute internet, sharing a final meal, etc. Some of us are going to hitch a taxi to an artisinal market that should be interesting. I hope all is well, and I will be seeing you soon.
love, em
Monday, May 12, 2008
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
La Fin
The final title is: A case study of Medicinal Plants and Their Changing Availability at Two Sites South of Toliara. Big surprise (being a little sarcastic here), but the biggest threat to the habitats that I observed was the burning of wood for charcoal. Charcoal is basically the only way that the Malagasy people cook food. Supplying urban centers with charcoal is the number one cause of deforestation and habitiat destruction in the southwest Spiny Forest Ecoregion...and was the number one reason why there have been changes in the medicinal plants available at the two sites I studied. Situations are complex, though, and solutions are not simple. I won't go much further as it would require a lot of background information, but that's the gist of it.
All of the students convened in Fort Dauphin for two days of presentations. They were awesome! It was really interesting to hear about so many topics from different regions: marine sacred sites, education system in Faux-Cap, the mining industry (really really scary), shark fishing, ecotourism evaluations, etc....I really need to write about all it for myself.
Now we are in Tana for a day, picking up baggage, printing, etc. Onward to the northern beaches for some relaxation and a GIANT music festival. It should be fun, but I don't think i'm ready to be a tourist. It is very difficult to imagine that I will be home in TN in just a week. I knew this time would come, but my brain nonetheless is feeling uneasy. I'm excited to come home (family!), and i'm genuinely excited to be going back out to SROM to work, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to leave Madagascar.
Much love, Em
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
très occupée
I realise there are some things that I have left out of my blog (well, more than some...). Before we began out ISP, we had a nine week "Environmental Issues" study to do behind all of our lectures, traveling, and such. Mine was on public health and sanitation...water and trash is what it turned into (not literally of course). I interviewed all kinds of people: average street folk, doctor, a PhD student, several government officials, public works employees, etc. Finding written, and what I consider reliable, sources in this country can be nearly impossible So my final report was what I managed to find out, and not necessarily hard fact. It was still very worthwhile, though. Clean water is an enormous issue/problem for a lot of the Malagasy people. And for many developping nations. (I did get my hands on one good book about Third World Cities written several decades ago.)
Another thing I think I've failed to mention: the difficulty of being a white woman here. People aren't mean-- but men are ridiculous. I walk down the street and people hiss (i don't know how else to describe the noise) and say, "Bonjour cherie" "Tu es mon amour cherie," even being looked up and down like I am a desirable piece of meat. I've asked people about it, but many don't really know (ie they are men or Malagasy women). However, one person did tell me that there is almost a worship mentality of Americans. Nonetheless it makes me very angry. Sometimes I can laugh at the situation and how ridiculous they are.
For example, one day walking through the market past the meat stands (boy does that make one a vegetarian) and a guy with a nasty wife beater on, covered in meat juice and smelling of it, stretches out his arms right in front of me and says "BONJOUR CHERIE!" I gave him the dirtiest of looks, said "Non" really emphatically, and dodged him. In the meat market...!
I guess I should also take this time to say that Malagasy women have a very defined and restricted position. A man's decision rules. It's a woman's job to run the house and have children. They do not go out at night and can't drink (unless you are prostitute). If the man in a relationship is infertile, it is outwardly blamed on the women while the women must buy the medicinal plants to help him. Maybe all these Malagasy garcons are not used to asking, but demanding? It's really sad that they don't really have examples of how women deserve to be loved and respected.
Anyways, I realise now how much it has affected my stay. If I were here with a man-- even just to walk around with== things would be different. It's created fear, anxiety, a stone-cold face, and a greater inability to get to know the Malagasy people. For example, when an Irish PhD student joined our crew for a few days I found myself ignoring him as much as possible. I had become trained. Male: don't look him in the face, don't speak to him, avoid. I think by day 2 I realised this and apologized to him.
So brief overview of the past week plus:
-getting to know a fellow SITer a lot more as we are living together renting a room from a slightly crazy Malagasy woman. buying and cooking all of our own food and trying to fend off the rats!
-I spent my time in the field for my ISP at two sites. One, Namakia, I camped and cooked my own food. Good 'ole rice and lentils. A lot of mangroves and littorale scrubby stuff. Beautiful moon, drawing water from a well, learned a little more Malagasy, pounded some coffee beans, got to gather plants, and met a few people that are worthy of proper descriptions.
-second site, St. Augustine: worked with the local ombiasy for 2 days. vistited two very different habitats. learned about the local problems, saw a hog that was hog-tied (heehee), dealt with some creepy vazaha at a hotel, had some quality God-time, and gathered many more plants.
there's a lot more I could say. Maybe for future blogs! I'm still learning so much, and it's a little scary to think that I only have three more weeks. I have so much left to do, and s little time. But I'm excited to create a final product that is valuable to me and to others. I wish I had time to really write about the things that I am learning, but alas...
emily
Another thing I think I've failed to mention: the difficulty of being a white woman here. People aren't mean-- but men are ridiculous. I walk down the street and people hiss (i don't know how else to describe the noise) and say, "Bonjour cherie" "Tu es mon amour cherie," even being looked up and down like I am a desirable piece of meat. I've asked people about it, but many don't really know (ie they are men or Malagasy women). However, one person did tell me that there is almost a worship mentality of Americans. Nonetheless it makes me very angry. Sometimes I can laugh at the situation and how ridiculous they are.
For example, one day walking through the market past the meat stands (boy does that make one a vegetarian) and a guy with a nasty wife beater on, covered in meat juice and smelling of it, stretches out his arms right in front of me and says "BONJOUR CHERIE!" I gave him the dirtiest of looks, said "Non" really emphatically, and dodged him. In the meat market...!
I guess I should also take this time to say that Malagasy women have a very defined and restricted position. A man's decision rules. It's a woman's job to run the house and have children. They do not go out at night and can't drink (unless you are prostitute). If the man in a relationship is infertile, it is outwardly blamed on the women while the women must buy the medicinal plants to help him. Maybe all these Malagasy garcons are not used to asking, but demanding? It's really sad that they don't really have examples of how women deserve to be loved and respected.
Anyways, I realise now how much it has affected my stay. If I were here with a man-- even just to walk around with== things would be different. It's created fear, anxiety, a stone-cold face, and a greater inability to get to know the Malagasy people. For example, when an Irish PhD student joined our crew for a few days I found myself ignoring him as much as possible. I had become trained. Male: don't look him in the face, don't speak to him, avoid. I think by day 2 I realised this and apologized to him.
So brief overview of the past week plus:
-getting to know a fellow SITer a lot more as we are living together renting a room from a slightly crazy Malagasy woman. buying and cooking all of our own food and trying to fend off the rats!
-I spent my time in the field for my ISP at two sites. One, Namakia, I camped and cooked my own food. Good 'ole rice and lentils. A lot of mangroves and littorale scrubby stuff. Beautiful moon, drawing water from a well, learned a little more Malagasy, pounded some coffee beans, got to gather plants, and met a few people that are worthy of proper descriptions.
-second site, St. Augustine: worked with the local ombiasy for 2 days. vistited two very different habitats. learned about the local problems, saw a hog that was hog-tied (heehee), dealt with some creepy vazaha at a hotel, had some quality God-time, and gathered many more plants.
there's a lot more I could say. Maybe for future blogs! I'm still learning so much, and it's a little scary to think that I only have three more weeks. I have so much left to do, and s little time. But I'm excited to create a final product that is valuable to me and to others. I wish I had time to really write about the things that I am learning, but alas...
emily
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Tana to Toliara
01 Apr 2008
I feel as if I am standing on a ray. It starts at zero and goes towards infinity. It represents my time here and my ability to understand this place (spatially, culturally, economically, etc.). I'm standing somewhere to the right of zero. When I look back towards the beginning I can say "wow, look what i've learned, look how far I've come" but when I turn around, well, i've haven't moved at all. Maybe I should stand with an eye in each direction.
It's hard to believe that it's april and that i'm in this crazy city in Madagascar. Taking a shower here makes me feel like i"m in a bourne movie. (where's the black hair dye and scissors?)
03 Apr. 2008
We visited a zoo in Tana today. I know it's good for city folk to see and understand what wildlife is, but it was rather depressing. Large, beautiful birds of prey in a cage the size of a living room, a small living room. I saw many species of lemurs, but there was no glamour, no excitement. Just sadness staring at them through their screens.
We also visited an orphanage north of Tana: Orpheliat Akany Avoko. 120 children, mostly girls with 2 housing facilities. Most girls end up there through the Malagasy social work system, ie they have really terrible stories. We visited just to see, but also to learn about the environmentally friendly things they are doing simply out of necessity. Compost toilets, rainwater collection, solar ovens, make different charcoal and use with a fuel effecient stove, biogaz toilet, etc. They have a small school for the younger kids, and then they go to school outside. However, for girls that show up 16 yrs old never having learned to read....they put them on a different track and learn vocational type work: hairdressers, mofakondro baking, etc. They also use recycled paper to make paper again and make greeting cards, etc that they sell in a shop. All the proceeds go directly to the girls. THey also have a printshop and can make/sell t=shirts. We got to spend some time with the youngest kids. Overall, I was quite impressed! However, I also have to realise that this represents only a small portion of Malagasy homeless or abused children. The kids here are relatively lucky.
5 Apr.
How do we really understand eachother? What is communication? Is it all just words, words, and speaking without understanding? Is there always too much background information? Are there too many unspoken's? Are my ways of thinking, patterns of thought, categories of ideas, incompatible with others?
Being here has become a reality. It's weird to think that in a month or so it will no longer be a reality. I come here and don't belong in distinct ways, but Madagascar changes me nonetheless. So when I come home, do I really belong there either? Obviously I think it's worth it....otherwise there would have been no journey.
Right now if I were given the opportunity to worship with others, I would whole=heartedly. But where is my faith of a mustard seed? God's word is not exciting... I can't give my full attention to it. Not to meditation or prayer. I'm distracted by my own insecurities, anxiousness, thoughts, etc.
Then amongst all my rambling thoughts concerning belief in God what do I see posted on the taxi brousse wall, "Je suis avec vous tous les jours." (I am with you all the days) I don't know, I may not ever know.....and that's okay.
8 Apr.
Taxi-brousse: small van piled high, high, HIGH with tarps and rope to tie everything in place. Hard seats, 14 people or so, ride for over 24 hours, stop and ward off the vendors (scarves, mof balls, chicken, simosas, corn, rice cakes, none of which looks appetizing after 19 hours in a car), esape to pee, back ache, left leg no circulation, neck popping, where do I put my arm? I'm telling you, there's definitly room for my head there....
I"m in Toliara now working with medicinal plant vendors. I'll be in the field by the end of the week documenting medicinal plants of SW Madagascar. Basically my info will help (in small part) in the creation of an environmental education center near a small fishing village (Ankilibe 15 km south of toliara). A guy from WWF is the brainchild. He's working with others to try to get the funding from various organisations.
I had my first interviews with vendors today and it was GREAT! so much worry and it was really quite easy. Evette, the main gal, was so smiling and friendly. She was excited to share her knowledge with me. Moreover, now the first one is over. The rest are going to be really manageable....
love to EVERYONE,
emily
I feel as if I am standing on a ray. It starts at zero and goes towards infinity. It represents my time here and my ability to understand this place (spatially, culturally, economically, etc.). I'm standing somewhere to the right of zero. When I look back towards the beginning I can say "wow, look what i've learned, look how far I've come" but when I turn around, well, i've haven't moved at all. Maybe I should stand with an eye in each direction.
It's hard to believe that it's april and that i'm in this crazy city in Madagascar. Taking a shower here makes me feel like i"m in a bourne movie. (where's the black hair dye and scissors?)
03 Apr. 2008
We visited a zoo in Tana today. I know it's good for city folk to see and understand what wildlife is, but it was rather depressing. Large, beautiful birds of prey in a cage the size of a living room, a small living room. I saw many species of lemurs, but there was no glamour, no excitement. Just sadness staring at them through their screens.
We also visited an orphanage north of Tana: Orpheliat Akany Avoko. 120 children, mostly girls with 2 housing facilities. Most girls end up there through the Malagasy social work system, ie they have really terrible stories. We visited just to see, but also to learn about the environmentally friendly things they are doing simply out of necessity. Compost toilets, rainwater collection, solar ovens, make different charcoal and use with a fuel effecient stove, biogaz toilet, etc. They have a small school for the younger kids, and then they go to school outside. However, for girls that show up 16 yrs old never having learned to read....they put them on a different track and learn vocational type work: hairdressers, mofakondro baking, etc. They also use recycled paper to make paper again and make greeting cards, etc that they sell in a shop. All the proceeds go directly to the girls. THey also have a printshop and can make/sell t=shirts. We got to spend some time with the youngest kids. Overall, I was quite impressed! However, I also have to realise that this represents only a small portion of Malagasy homeless or abused children. The kids here are relatively lucky.
5 Apr.
How do we really understand eachother? What is communication? Is it all just words, words, and speaking without understanding? Is there always too much background information? Are there too many unspoken's? Are my ways of thinking, patterns of thought, categories of ideas, incompatible with others?
Being here has become a reality. It's weird to think that in a month or so it will no longer be a reality. I come here and don't belong in distinct ways, but Madagascar changes me nonetheless. So when I come home, do I really belong there either? Obviously I think it's worth it....otherwise there would have been no journey.
Right now if I were given the opportunity to worship with others, I would whole=heartedly. But where is my faith of a mustard seed? God's word is not exciting... I can't give my full attention to it. Not to meditation or prayer. I'm distracted by my own insecurities, anxiousness, thoughts, etc.
Then amongst all my rambling thoughts concerning belief in God what do I see posted on the taxi brousse wall, "Je suis avec vous tous les jours." (I am with you all the days) I don't know, I may not ever know.....and that's okay.
8 Apr.
Taxi-brousse: small van piled high, high, HIGH with tarps and rope to tie everything in place. Hard seats, 14 people or so, ride for over 24 hours, stop and ward off the vendors (scarves, mof balls, chicken, simosas, corn, rice cakes, none of which looks appetizing after 19 hours in a car), esape to pee, back ache, left leg no circulation, neck popping, where do I put my arm? I'm telling you, there's definitly room for my head there....
I"m in Toliara now working with medicinal plant vendors. I'll be in the field by the end of the week documenting medicinal plants of SW Madagascar. Basically my info will help (in small part) in the creation of an environmental education center near a small fishing village (Ankilibe 15 km south of toliara). A guy from WWF is the brainchild. He's working with others to try to get the funding from various organisations.
I had my first interviews with vendors today and it was GREAT! so much worry and it was really quite easy. Evette, the main gal, was so smiling and friendly. She was excited to share her knowledge with me. Moreover, now the first one is over. The rest are going to be really manageable....
love to EVERYONE,
emily
Monday, March 31, 2008
Antananarivo (Tana) & Andasibe
So I've been in Tana, the capital and largest city of Madagascar for three days in total (not including the visit to Anasibe). It's really big in relation to anywhere else that I have been so far: flushing toilets, semi running water, tall buildings, restaurants of many kindsm clothing shops, ice cream, 'bookstores,'etc. It's a little bizarre. The city is definitely more western, and therefore to a certain extent doesn't feel as Malagasy. But I'm enjoying the time with wide-eyes and walking slowly.
Before our visit to Andasibe we met up with SIT students on the Culture & Society program to see a Malagasy music performance. I went into the evening really craving some alone and journaling time, but ended up having a really great time. We heard music and saw dance from different regions in Madagascar. Performance dancing quickly became participatory dancing, and man was there a lot of dancing. I loved it: the performers dances, familiar Tandroy dances, our crews Faux Cap dances, played follow the leader with the pros, and generally had a grand ole time. Really fun!!!
The next day we left for Andasibe. Along the way we stopped at Madagscar Exotique where chameleons, frogs, snakes, butterflies, geckos, and other various creatures are raised/bred for education, tourism, and research purposes. It was the bomb!!! I saw the coolest chameleons and frogs that I will ever see in my entire life. There are too many to recount: beautiful colors, amazing facial structures, protruding eyes, hands with five toes seperated in two sections, distinct walks, long curled tails, amazingly long tongues to catch insects at long distances. I really wish I could post some pictures...BIG, small, all colors, all shapes....
AND i got to hold the smallest reptile in the world-- the Brookesia minima. It was about an inch long as an adult. Feet so tiny with so many moveable parts all working together. At this point in the trip I didn't think that I was going to get to see one. Although it was in a zoo-type environment, it still made me REALLY happy. YEA! We also got to play with leaf geckos (and seriously I could go on and on about these as well), boas, brightly-colored and winged stick buugs, a large tomatoe frog, two species of tiny and brilliant frogs, more chameleons, butterflies, a HUGE beautiful moth, more chameleons, a baby boa, and more chameleons. It was overwhelmingly wonderful. After arrival at the hotel we went on a night walk to see more wildlife that I don't have the time to talk about. It was a beautiful night that felt a lot like a Tennesse summer. I felt like either running or dancing and ended up doing some of both.
In the morning we went on a walk in the parc-- a rainforest full of weird plants and epiphytes that I have never seen in my life. We also saw, or rather tried to see, the leaf-tailed gecko. CRAZY camoflauge! We also saw the Indri indri, another species of lemur. THey are the largest, maybe the size of a short human being...4ft or so. They are colored kind of like a panda with small furry ears and no tail. Moreover, they have an extremely loud and eerie wail that can be heard up to three km away. On a solitary bathroom stop I was surrounded (from high in the trees) and simply could not believe the force of their..wailing. It was surreal and awe-some.
I have more to say that isn't just facts, but I've locked my hotel-mate out of the room and need to get back. Hope everyone is doing well! We're hoping to get mail from FD tomorrow!! love, em
Before our visit to Andasibe we met up with SIT students on the Culture & Society program to see a Malagasy music performance. I went into the evening really craving some alone and journaling time, but ended up having a really great time. We heard music and saw dance from different regions in Madagascar. Performance dancing quickly became participatory dancing, and man was there a lot of dancing. I loved it: the performers dances, familiar Tandroy dances, our crews Faux Cap dances, played follow the leader with the pros, and generally had a grand ole time. Really fun!!!
The next day we left for Andasibe. Along the way we stopped at Madagscar Exotique where chameleons, frogs, snakes, butterflies, geckos, and other various creatures are raised/bred for education, tourism, and research purposes. It was the bomb!!! I saw the coolest chameleons and frogs that I will ever see in my entire life. There are too many to recount: beautiful colors, amazing facial structures, protruding eyes, hands with five toes seperated in two sections, distinct walks, long curled tails, amazingly long tongues to catch insects at long distances. I really wish I could post some pictures...BIG, small, all colors, all shapes....
AND i got to hold the smallest reptile in the world-- the Brookesia minima. It was about an inch long as an adult. Feet so tiny with so many moveable parts all working together. At this point in the trip I didn't think that I was going to get to see one. Although it was in a zoo-type environment, it still made me REALLY happy. YEA! We also got to play with leaf geckos (and seriously I could go on and on about these as well), boas, brightly-colored and winged stick buugs, a large tomatoe frog, two species of tiny and brilliant frogs, more chameleons, butterflies, a HUGE beautiful moth, more chameleons, a baby boa, and more chameleons. It was overwhelmingly wonderful. After arrival at the hotel we went on a night walk to see more wildlife that I don't have the time to talk about. It was a beautiful night that felt a lot like a Tennesse summer. I felt like either running or dancing and ended up doing some of both.
In the morning we went on a walk in the parc-- a rainforest full of weird plants and epiphytes that I have never seen in my life. We also saw, or rather tried to see, the leaf-tailed gecko. CRAZY camoflauge! We also saw the Indri indri, another species of lemur. THey are the largest, maybe the size of a short human being...4ft or so. They are colored kind of like a panda with small furry ears and no tail. Moreover, they have an extremely loud and eerie wail that can be heard up to three km away. On a solitary bathroom stop I was surrounded (from high in the trees) and simply could not believe the force of their..wailing. It was surreal and awe-some.
I have more to say that isn't just facts, but I've locked my hotel-mate out of the room and need to get back. Hope everyone is doing well! We're hoping to get mail from FD tomorrow!! love, em
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Parcs National
Since Toliara we've been camping and traveling through four national parks: Isalo, Anja, Andringitra, et Ranomafana. At Isalo we saw lots of interesting rock formations, swam in a natural piscine, and went on a sunrise walk to see the canyon from above. In Anja an Irish man from an English university joined our crew, Bary Ferguson. He's working on his PhD in the Mandrare Valley region in community based ecotourism. We had two formal lectures from him, but also spent a lot of time just picking his brain. He's been in/around Madagascar for quite some time and was very open to oour questions/ goofing off. In Anja we also saw some cliff tombs that were both beautiful and impressive. Coffins 100s of feet up in eroded pockets of rock.
In Andringitra we a saw different variant of lemur catta, and climbed Madagascar's second highest peak-- Imarivolanitra (2658m) "close to the heavens." It was formerly named after a researcher's dog, Pk. Boby. I'm glad they renamed it. We also saw several different chameleon's all no bigger than my pointer finger. One was digging a hole to lay her eggs in!
Ranomafana literallly means hot water, and is the most touristy of all the parcs we visited. We ran into bus groups going on guided tours-- a little bizarre to see so many pale skinned Europeans. Here we saw the Golden Bamboo lemur, chameleons, frogs, and a harmless snake that was going to eat a chameleon. PS the snails here are HUGE...about the size of a fat twinkie. I also got to see up close another species of mouselemur on a night walk. I know they're wild animals, but dang it was cute. We also got a lecture from BioVal, a nonprofit working in/around RanomafanThis whole journey between parcs was filled with farmland, mostly rice cultivation. and lots of burning. It's ironic to see a sign to enter a parc, andlook around to see the hills smoking...
I feel as if I am beginning to synthesize information and experiences more. Understanding situations in order to ask critical questions, etc. Also have realized more about my presence here. I was not warned that because I am white and female that I would be hit on almost mercilessly. Because of this, I have to walk down the street with determination, and learn how to give people rather evil stares. I'm used to being nice to people... How do I show love to people with such a culture and language barrier?
I've also realised that I probably sounded a bit critical or depressed about the village stay. Although that is accurate and those observations are real...they are not the whole picture. I just happened to be interviewing villagers about a part of their life that is really DIFFICULT. there are many others aspects of their lives that are joyful and beautiful. Maybe I'm coming to appreciate those things more now? There is beauty in the breakdown that exists here--- and the breakdown that exists across the globe. I've also thought a lot about what the word development means. Surprisingly enough, there are many people working/helping out here that haven't thought about it.
Oddly enough, the group of American students here has made me think about who I am...They see such a small portion of what I think of as myself, and most of those factors are external: I have an eyebrow ring, I don't smoke, I love mountains and rocks, I'm the one who knows a little about plants, and i'm more of a tomboy.... BUt ultimately I am a daughter of God, a sister to others, and a woman of God.God has made me with love, and continues to make me resilient and beautiful. I've been able to say this to others a lot: you areloved, you are cared for, you are beautiful. BUt I don't know how much I've been able to receive this, think this about myself. So....I'm receiving. and it's really nice.
Red dirt scraping the earth
Colonial vocabulary howling by
palm, brick, shelter
and soft pierced ears.
There is no forest.
There is no forest.
There is no forest.
Rice moves higher jusqu'a
Mountains collapse on themselves
as bodies churn.
Feet pound again, and again.
Circle forms, souffle fort et sharp
Hands tremor, tremble, raised high
Joy greets Pain: familiar smile and knowing eyes.
Mamapriza grunts a nod
pounding, tako, grinding, tako
My vazaha mind is a ball and chain around my throat.
How do I say I love you?
I'm leaving soon and I need to say I love you.
My soul is choking on the words.
Western law calls itself Jesus.
Top down shalls and shall-nots
You know, there is a dead body on that cross.
His feet were dirty too.
Don't fix me.
Scars on scars on hearts from failed operations.
Brothers, sisters, please,
down to the river to pray.
Dad's waiting with open eyes.
In Andringitra we a saw different variant of lemur catta, and climbed Madagascar's second highest peak-- Imarivolanitra (2658m) "close to the heavens." It was formerly named after a researcher's dog, Pk. Boby. I'm glad they renamed it. We also saw several different chameleon's all no bigger than my pointer finger. One was digging a hole to lay her eggs in!
Ranomafana literallly means hot water, and is the most touristy of all the parcs we visited. We ran into bus groups going on guided tours-- a little bizarre to see so many pale skinned Europeans. Here we saw the Golden Bamboo lemur, chameleons, frogs, and a harmless snake that was going to eat a chameleon. PS the snails here are HUGE...about the size of a fat twinkie. I also got to see up close another species of mouselemur on a night walk. I know they're wild animals, but dang it was cute. We also got a lecture from BioVal, a nonprofit working in/around RanomafanThis whole journey between parcs was filled with farmland, mostly rice cultivation. and lots of burning. It's ironic to see a sign to enter a parc, andlook around to see the hills smoking...
I feel as if I am beginning to synthesize information and experiences more. Understanding situations in order to ask critical questions, etc. Also have realized more about my presence here. I was not warned that because I am white and female that I would be hit on almost mercilessly. Because of this, I have to walk down the street with determination, and learn how to give people rather evil stares. I'm used to being nice to people... How do I show love to people with such a culture and language barrier?
I've also realised that I probably sounded a bit critical or depressed about the village stay. Although that is accurate and those observations are real...they are not the whole picture. I just happened to be interviewing villagers about a part of their life that is really DIFFICULT. there are many others aspects of their lives that are joyful and beautiful. Maybe I'm coming to appreciate those things more now? There is beauty in the breakdown that exists here--- and the breakdown that exists across the globe. I've also thought a lot about what the word development means. Surprisingly enough, there are many people working/helping out here that haven't thought about it.
Oddly enough, the group of American students here has made me think about who I am...They see such a small portion of what I think of as myself, and most of those factors are external: I have an eyebrow ring, I don't smoke, I love mountains and rocks, I'm the one who knows a little about plants, and i'm more of a tomboy.... BUt ultimately I am a daughter of God, a sister to others, and a woman of God.God has made me with love, and continues to make me resilient and beautiful. I've been able to say this to others a lot: you areloved, you are cared for, you are beautiful. BUt I don't know how much I've been able to receive this, think this about myself. So....I'm receiving. and it's really nice.
Red dirt scraping the earth
Colonial vocabulary howling by
palm, brick, shelter
and soft pierced ears.
There is no forest.
There is no forest.
There is no forest.
Rice moves higher jusqu'a
Mountains collapse on themselves
as bodies churn.
Feet pound again, and again.
Circle forms, souffle fort et sharp
Hands tremor, tremble, raised high
Joy greets Pain: familiar smile and knowing eyes.
Mamapriza grunts a nod
pounding, tako, grinding, tako
My vazaha mind is a ball and chain around my throat.
How do I say I love you?
I'm leaving soon and I need to say I love you.
My soul is choking on the words.
Western law calls itself Jesus.
Top down shalls and shall-nots
You know, there is a dead body on that cross.
His feet were dirty too.
Don't fix me.
Scars on scars on hearts from failed operations.
Brothers, sisters, please,
down to the river to pray.
Dad's waiting with open eyes.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
i forgot to mention. although i will be traveling around, mail should still be sent to the Fort Dauphin address. We have SIT staff moving around and checking up on us during our ISPs..... ,uch llove, em
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